Update on My Search (Not the One You’re Thinking About Though)

This week I have two interviews. One is today, in three hours to be more precise, and the other one is on Thursday. In shaa Allah I’ll find something soon. I’m not worried about that part of my life.

However, I still haven’t found a place. For those that don’t know, I’m looking for an apartment to rent for myself and my mom. We’re currently staying at my brother’s place (before that, the whole family lived in a big house – as the family grew, we had to separate), but mom and I need a home of our own. For those of you that aren’t familiar with the housing conditions in Stockholm; to find a first-hand rental contract in this city, you have to stand in a rental line for years… and when I say years, I mean like at least 10 years to have any realistic expectations. I’ve only been on the line for five years (will be six by February I think), so my prospects are bleak. This is causing me a lot of anxiety, especially as mom keeps stressing me about it. Your average Asian/Muslim girl perhaps does not face these kind of situations, which is why I have a hard time explaining my anxiety to people in our community. If you have a parental home, you’re pretty much set until you get married.

Anyway… every time I write something or tell someone about above issue, I get all of these useless suggestions from people. No offence, I know it sounds really rude, I mean people are trying to help after all… but one thing you should know about me is that I’m a solution-oriented person. Unless I’m actually asking for suggestions/advice, I don’t want it. If I know my readers right however, you’re still going to suggest things (just as whenever I tell you not to contact me personally every time I’m on a rant, to check up on me, you still do it). So let me stop you right there by telling you how these, which are suggestions I’ve already received and which undoubtedly will be the only suggestions you’ll end up giving me, won’t work for me:

  1. Why don’t you try getting a second-hand contract? I e renting someone’s apartment privately. Because I want a home of my own, not something temporary from where I’ll have to move out whenever the owner of the apartment wants me to. I don’t need anything temporary, we’re already staying somewhere.
  2. Why don’t you move abroad? Really? If you were looking to move out of your current home and you couldn’t find anything in your city, the first thought in your mind would be to move abroad? This is my country, my home. I’m not a temporary resident here. And also, how is moving abroad a much easier option than finding a place here??
  3. Why don’t you buy a place? First of all, I don’t have enough savings (actually I don’t have enough to call them “savings”). Secondly, housing prices are so high we’d  end up in the far outskirts of the city, probably not even close to a subway/train station. Buying something may be an option for later in life, or when I eventually might get married (yeah ok go ahead laugh), but right now it’s not possible for me.

There, I’m pretty sure I covered it all. Now please refrain from giving me suggestions. If you really care about me, please make du’a. Nothing is more precious and nothing will help me more. What has Allah not provided me with – so many things I never expected to get in life alhamdulillah.

Once again, because I know some of you have fingers itching for criticizing me – I’m not gonna say that it’s your fault for being offended, because I know I come across as harsh sometimes – please refrain from telling me off about how ungrateful I am. I honestly do appreciate all of you guys, especially those of you that comment (and please continue doing so!), but I’d rather receive a productive or empathetic comment than one where you’re trying to solve my problems.

And if you want to see a relatively less harsh side of me LOL, follow me on Twitter @AlohoNorah.

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10 thoughts on “Update on My Search (Not the One You’re Thinking About Though)

  1. Hahahaha! So much love for this post. Obviously, I hope your situation improves inshallah. I feel just as strongly as you do about suggestions that I never asked for. Sometimes I wanna tell people, “just listen to me whinge and tell me what I want to hear” even if just for a few minutes, sometimes that is all you need to feel a little peaceful. I seldom give advice for this reason. Off to find you on twitter (🐦 <– but blue)

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    1. Um… it’s not a big deal… and why are you talking about this on my blog :/? I’m here less often than I’m on Twitter you know. I’d rather comments here stick to the topics of the post. You can write whatever you want to me on Twitter :P.

      Like

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