Half of my family just left for a six week trip to Bangladesh. It feels quite empty and I’m really going to miss Eron. I’m a bit scared that by the time they get back, he won’t recognize me anymore :(. Furthermore, I share the basement floor with mom. So now when she’s gone I have it all to myself… which is something I was actually looking forward to, but now it just feels empty. I never thought I’d be saying this but I actually wish I went with them. But I cant… nothing can stop me from graduating this summer inshaa Allah. Besides, I already have plans to spend Ramadan over there.

I keep talking about how I want to move out, but I’m seriously starting to doubt whether or not I’ll be able to live by myself or only with mom. I’m so used to the presence and the sound of the kids that even one going away makes this house feel empty. Oh well, I’m glad that’s a worry for another day.

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6 thoughts on “

  1. Gosh just found this post buried in my ‘to read’ pile. I thought I’d caught up with all your posts!
    Sorry to read how sad you felt here. You know, it gets easier the more you live on your own. I know some people who have lived on their own so long they couldn’t BEAR the thought of someone else living in their house now! πŸ™‚

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    1. I have to disagree with you here because I’ve lived on my own (I’m not on my own here, still have four other people left :P) in a tiny little room for three years… well not completely… the amount of times I came home kind of proves how much I hated it. I never want to live on my own ever again!

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      1. I think there are a number of factors (while acknowledging only you know ultimately what makes you tick) – you were younger, it was your first time and actually three years isn’t very long! Let alone that a tiny room is more like a prison whereas a house or flat is your own kingdom!
        Some prefer solitude more than others of course (I hate being on my own yet need space too), and it may be that you aren’t someone who could cope with it so well. But I think you definitely struggle with too many people around too! Perhaps living alone but being able to come home regularly would be the best answer for you in the end? Just a thought! πŸ™‚

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        1. You know at first I thought it’d be a pain living with so many people but I’ve become so used to it that only a few of them leaving makes it feel empty… I don’t know how I’ll be able to live without these kids!

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